I feel so needy and clingy….I don’t want to scare him away but….he hasn’t talked to me in over a day….this hasn’t happened before…
I probably sound stupid but I just worry about him…
I know how that feels.
Really? That actually makes me feel a bit better
Yeah, it’s never any fun. You just want to keep texting or calling until they finally answer, but you don’t want to be ‘THAT’ person.
the next time someone tells me
depression is a learned behavior
i am letting you know right now
that it’s not going to end well.
webster’s definition of learned behavior:
“the actions or reactions of a person or animal
in response to external or internal stimuli,
usually as a result of a reward
so tell me, please, at what point
were we ever rewarded for wanting to kill ourselves?
go on, tell me how cutting is for attention
when most of us kids wear long sleeves through
eighty degree weather just to avoid confrontation,
tell me about how it’s a secret we’re painting on our
skin when we’ve learned how many marks we can make and
how often before it really starts showing, when we’ve tattooed
the softest places of us because they’re the best hidden – go on,
tell me about how we’re rewarded for not being able to
get out of bed by that little voice that’s fucking pounding away
inside of our heads and screaming about how we’re pieces
of shit for being a burden on everyone,
tell me how it’s a reward
that schools and friends and family don’t see
“god help me” as a legitimate excuse
so you end up with eighteen days of homework you just don’t have the energy to do, tell me how we’re really
conditioned into this behavior when instead we’re punished for
it at every turn with “get over it, all kids feel bummed,” really, please
talk to me about how kids these days just don’t understand the
reality of the situation as if we’ve been blind our whole lives and
you’re privy to some deeper secret than we’ll ever hope to achieve – hey,
maybe you know where our retirement money is going, maybe
you can tell the kids who never got to go to art class to work out their problems because creativity as an outlet wasn’t important
enough for the budget - go on, tell those kids that they’re just faking their sorrow, hey while you’re at it,
maybe you can tell the preschoolers i teach
“in twelve years at graduation all your hard work is going to mean nothing,” i mean
you’re literally ripping any source of purpose from our lives
and then blaming us for the apathy and the desire to run away
into the woods and stop existing, you’re taping smiles to our
faces and thinking that it’s a medical solution instead of
a cosmetic placeholder, but i mean, go on,
tell the parents of dead kids that
you taught them to kill themselves, please. i want you
to stand up with me and explain to any sixteen year old
honors student who is shrinking in size and crying at night
that she’s starving herself because
she’s too just stupid to shake her classical conditioning off
instead of the chemical imbalance that’s tipping her brain
from a well-oiled machine into a gaping wound, go on, look
her in the eyes and say, “you learned to be like this,” despite
the doctors and the hospital trips and the medication her
family is paying for out of pocket
but i guess it’s learned behavior alright.
we’ve seen the world
and it’s too big to fight.
REBLOGGING THIS HERE FOR EXTRA COMMENTARY ADDED BELOW. PLEASE READ & CIRCULATE.
See this guy? That’s tumblr user and Supernatural fan andythanfiction.
He could be a totally fine person. But he is also this person. A con-artist, manipulator, fraudster and liar. Past and present pseudonyms include Andy Blake, thanfiction, Victoria Bitter, Amy Player, and Jordan Wood. Read the blog post at that link, and read this: A Letter To The DAYDians: My Life With Andrew Blake Laid Bare.
andythanfiction writes great SPN and Destiel meta but there’s something about his self-righteous tone in posts like this that really pisses me off, considering his past. And his past is not that far in the past. So I decided to post this in the hopes that people at least share the link around. Please read this article and read the links and be aware who’s lecturing you on how to treat actors. And if you want a really interesting read and a history of this guy’s past cons, frauds, manipulations and lies, read this book: When A Fan Hits The Shit, or at least click that link and read the book description. Or click here and read the short version, insofar as this story can be short.
It’s no exaggeration to say that Andy Blake/Jordan Wood/Victoria Bitter has left lives ruined. As recently as 2011 he was present during fatal shootings. Turimel, who wrote the book linked above, shares her thoughts on those shootings here. Do not think of this guy as a victim. Read the accounts of those he has left behind him and understand who he really is. Or at least who he has been until very recently.
Please, Destiel fandom, read andythanfiction’s meta all you like, but know who you’re dealing with. And let other people know. You never know when someone like this will spot their next mark, so I write this post in the hopes that it will be shared and maybe it will save someone from being Victoria Bitter’s next target. Luckily I have had nothing to do with him but I do know vulnerable people and I know the chaos a person like this can cause in lives. So please, if you see this post, share it.
Juuuust in case.
I was part of a group of HP fans that Andy targeted back in 2008. This was early on while he was writing the DayDverse. I can attest to his manipulation and lies. Then he was Irish and running from the IRA and he had his first ‘terminal’ illness and he’d only live for a few months.
Lucky, most of us were tight knit and when warning bells went off, we talked about it and he didn’t get too far in, but still not without some people getting very hurt.
And I add to this warning.
When he arrived in HP fandom he was American, he did voice posts and he got into a ‘relationship’ with one of my flist on LJ where he spoke a lot on the phone with her. He was American for months.
Then he wanted to write a fanfic about Seamus and had some questions about Ireland for my friend from Ireland.
Next thing I know, my Irish friend is emailing me in a panic, telling me he had phoned her and asked her to vouch for him as his place to stay so he could get a visa to come and live in Ireland
She didn’t want him to live with her, she hadn’t invited him to live with her, and she didn’t want him showing up in her town.
I made a post on my LJ saying “You know who you are and you’re not as charming as you think. Leave my friends alone.” and with that he was gone (with a few moments of calling me the C word). He stopped trying to get in with me and my closest LJ friends (who are now very close real life friends).
We kept an eye on him and soon enough he became Irish…using all the research he’d done with my Irish friend. He ripped off a lot of people. He was very clever when it came to getting people’s home addresses and phone numbers. Years later we found out that his bull got some people killed.
Under no circumstances are you to let down your guard & I’m telling you to watch your friends’ backs.
He’s going to keep going until someone knocks him pretty far down. If he’s done all this… if you guys put all the evidence together, there is no way this shit is legal in… pretty much every damn country I can think of.
Guys, let me tell you about orcas.
Orca whales are mean motherfuckers. They cruise the oceans with only two things in mind: one, having sex, and two, eating every poor fuck they find out there that’s smaller than them. They are such badass motherfuckers that even great white motherfucking sharks don’t dare fuck with them, which in my books, places them above the sperm whale as Biggest Badass of the Ocean. And why don’t sharks bother them, you may wonder? Because orcas fucking learned that if you flip a shark over they go into a sort of coma, so now they do it intentionally so they can eat the motherfucking sharks. Not only that, but orcas have also learned how to hunt sperm whales and motherfucking sea birds.
The orca whale lives in a matriarchal pod. Every pod has unique hunting methods and whatnot, which is passed down from parent to offspring- these scary fuckers have formed civilizations. And what do they do for fun, apart from hopping around on the water’s surface and grinning like crazy mofos? They hunt for fun, going so far as to tip over ice floes and beach themselves just for the thrill of killing.
Now, I know what you’re thinking. Orca whales are too damn cute and smiley looking to be heartless predators of the sea. Well, let me counter-argue with this photo:
THOSE ARE NOT THE TEETH OF A CREATURE THAT WANTS TO BE YOUR FRIEND.
Reblogging for excellent commentary.
Why has nobody mentioned what’s happening in the original gif?
This is how orcas hunt - or, it’s one of the ways they do. They have a ton of tricks and techniques they use to fuck up everything below them on the food chain, and that gif portrays my personal favorite.
Orcas will literally BEACH THEMSELVES to grab unsuspecting seals (or whatever else happens to be splashing around in the surf) and snarf them down like hot dogs. Yeah, that’s right. This is a 6-ton apex predator, crashing right out of the fucking water to snatch their prey right off the beach. Any other animal that size would get stuck there and die, but do you see that fucker? He fucking wriggles right back into the surf. An orca can get all the way up onto dry land and still manage to wiggle their way back into the water to fuck up more shit on another day. There is literally no other sea-dwelling creature of comparative size with that ability - most sea animals lack the muscular strength to move without enough water supporting their weight.
Orcas have also been known to eat moose. Yeah, that’s right. Fucking MOOSE.
You don’t fuck with orcas.
Remember that orcas also eat white sharks and baby whales. They basically eat anything available, like humans.
(They also speak different languages depending the area where they live - for example New Zealand orcas have a twist in their language, while Canada orcas spoke with more musical and longer tone. Family pods also have different dialects. And every orca has a unique voice of its own!)